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Archive for March, 2010

What with my chronic rambling disorder and the ability to spew out 3000 words or more on just about anything, I thought I’d enforce a gagging order upon, er, myself. These notions of utterance don’t count, but once the next paragraph has begun the clock will start ticking. To ease the pressure, the title of the review, New Super Mario Bros. Wii, will undertake trimmage and be referred to as NSMB.W from here on in. Here goes… (more…)

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The title is, of course, in reference to the fine work that Team Mega64 put together for their advertisements of miscued stereotyping mockery on the Games Developer Conference. God bless those guys, their incredible levels of creativity and YouTube.

Moving on to matters of business, or less so what with the conference tending to focus on the design aspect of gaming rather than the throat-ramming aggression of the marketing fat cats that are likely rubbing their paws while salivating over the giant kipper that is E3 this June; GDC 2010 instead conducted its foray with dignity. With respected gaming personalities actually knowing what they’re talking about, small hints at what’s to come over the next nine months and a handful of confirmations, GDC, which attracted a record number of industry attendees, proved to be a pleasant stopgap in between that certain big hitter later this year. (more…)

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The second television-videogame segment brings us back to the BBC, only this time its more cheerful, more pink sister in BBC Three. First aired around a similar time to the previously covered Games Britannia: Joystick Generation is former PC Zone columnist and general satirical funnyman journalist Charlie Brooker’s version of videogaming education, which takes on a far different and arguably more accessible approach, particularly if you’re a fan of swearing and ranting. Take Brooker’s opening line as an idea of the kind of humour you’re currently due to read about and decide whether you’d find him more approachable than the softly spoken but ‘oh so posh’ Benjamin Woolley, ‘Videogames: bleeping, blooping masturbatory aides for emotionally crippled social outcasts; probably male outcasts; probably physically repugnant; sexually inexperienced; probably frightened of the real world; probably standing here on this very spot saying these very words to a camera right now; probably me, basically. Videogames are for losers like me, apparently.’ And then he trudges off to an arcade machine in the shot’s background. (more…)

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In a baffled, admittedly delayed, two-parter, the next series of paragraphs to grace this very canvass of gaming looks at a duo of recent BBC television programmes specifically about games, what they focus their beady eyes on and an attempt at dissecting their painful inaccuracy. TV doesn’t know anything about games, does it? The producers of these feature shows are all fat, middle-aged, bald, ignorant and have opinions about gaming that can be found etched on a cave-dweller’s wall from 3000 BC, right? Well, you would be mistaken, because, for once, someone with a camera and a few quid to piece together an hour’s worth of videogame banquet actually got it (almost) right. (more…)

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